Failures

by Katie Malco

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1.
Animal 04:28
Thirteen beers and a bad taste in my mouth Fell asleep on the last train headed south Passing through the suburbs of this town Comatose and I’m not coming out But I’m not an animal I won’t die here for you Take those worried eyes off me Carry me home I can’t breathe And let me fall into an empty sleep Thirteen beers and a bad taste in my mouth How the hell did I end up down south I don’t live in the suburbs of this town Someone help me how do I get out I’m not an animal I won’t die here for you Take those worried eyes off me Carry me home I can’t breathe And let me crawl into an empty sleep Take those worried eyes off me Carry me home I can’t breathe And let me crawl into an empty sleep
2.
Brooklyn 05:05
I watched you fly on the rides at Coney Island The wind was biting The sky was red burnt You looked just like birds overhead You took polaroids of a man proposing Everyone was applauding Arcade machines sang on As night turned to dawn then to light I was weak and tired The night before was a blur The taxi drove too fast The skyline rushing past our window But oh! How we danced! To the country band We drank and we swayed You told everyone it’s your birthday Then we walked home to Brooklyn And both of us were freezing And I asked what you were doing with your life I see you fading and I live across an ocean I talked you out of staying but I don’t know when you’ll come back You said don’t worry you don’t need anybody You’re living out your dreams in New York The sun came up behind us and everything turned to rust And birds sang to us as we walked And I know you’ll be alright You say I can’t let things lie I know you’re right you’re right
3.
Fractures 03:57
I crumbled mountains under my feet I took to the sky carelessly And when I got nowhere I fell to my knees Faced with face I swear this isn’t me I’ve no idea who this imposter could be And there’s no way of knowing so carry on growing at least We’re chasing laughter, pasting up the fractures And I know I can’t match up to her So I’ll be this for you if you want me to And I’ll love you endlessly If you can pretend to love me You left to go chase my dreams I applauded louder than I screamed And that’s the way that it should be We’re chasing laughter, pasting up the fractures And I know I can’t match up to her So I’ll be what you need even if it kills me And I’ll love you endlessly If you can pretend If you can pretend to love me
4.
September 03:30
And it struck me then that we only served to Offer each other temporary relief from solitude An artificial light in each other’s lives Dimly lit and flickering September begins and everything ends And you can no longer keep up the pretence Well I don’t blame you, I’m not the easiest company I don’t care about you I don’t care about me Please just let me sleep And now I understand how mournful it all was Threadbare and reckless and completely void of love But there’s this side of me that will drown us Together in the sea Together in the sea September begins and everything ends And you can no longer keep up the pretence Well who could blame you, I’m not the easiest company I don’t care about you I don’t care about me I don’t’ care about you You sure don’t care about me Please just let me sleep
5.
TW 03:15
We’re driving through the night to reach just south of Fife Lost in headlights, blurred bleary eyes We’ll celebrate your life And I’ll celebrate mine While I’m still alive Who’s first to see the sea, I sigh it was me No-one disagrees but no-one believes me We’ll set your spirit free Trapped for years in a failing body Now you’re free I remember you sat in the corner of the room Smiling as if you knew something no-one else knew We’ll celebrate your life And I’ll celebrate mine While I’m still alive I’m still alive
6.
Cold nights sprung upon me and I can hardly breathe I’m freezing but you don’t hold me And oh, it’s such a tragic scene The streetlight scatters through the trees and highlights your misery I won’t be coming home Another night alone will do us both some good hopefully Train travellers with their heads in their hands and their hearts in their throats We’re just like every one of them Don’t take the best of me then turn around and leave Don’t leave You won’t be coming home Another night alone will do us both some good And I won’t be coming home Another night alone will do us both some good hopefully
7.
Creatures 03:03
I hear creaks at night In a crimson light Feel the ground shake Half asleep half awake I see creatures They're my failures Watch them crawl Across every wall Lose the battle And lose the war I am tired I look older But there’s no truth In the glory of youth Lose the battle And lose the war Lose the battle And lose the war We're pretending Every day pretending We go places and we act happy But in the night our anger Makes a monument Between us
8.
I stood at the top of the highest mountain And still couldn’t see the light And I walked the width of the universe To lengthen this short sight So we’ll rally the troops, lets go to war And die side by side The sun will set, scarlet red Sat in a monet sky Side by side we’ll die Is it so hard to be Hard to be free When everything is crumbling And it’s hard to feel Like I’m not on a spinning wheel Round in circles tumbling I thought I conquered the unconquerable But there’s nothing to show for it You look at me, your eyes so miserable And it’s so hard to admit I’m the reason for it Is it so hard to be Hard to be free When everything is crumbling And it’s hard to feel Like I’m not on a spinning wheel Round in circles tumbling The stage is set for war Hear the peasants roar The stage is set for war Leave them wanting more Is it so hard to be Hard to be free When everything is crumbling And it’s hard to feel Like I haven’t burnt the last reel The finale is a mystery
9.
Peckham 03:17
Wake up with a headache again Call you up but you don’t say anything Go downstairs, I can hardly walk Holding on to a faint sense of worth There’s empty bottles all over the floor From when I felt alone the night before And I can’t tell you I don’t want to tell you I am empty I am a mess I’m not in control of any of this I’m falling backwards, I can’t say why The words always dissolve into lies And I can’t tell you No I don’t want to tell you I can’t tell you I don’t want to tell you Wake up with a headache again Call you up but you don’t say anything
10.
We fought for this We fought for everything we’d known When the thunder came We ran back to our empty homes And waited Waited for what would never come Resolution A sign of hope after all we’d done They’ll follow you They’ll follow you to their graves The rest will live The rest will live with your mistakes And then it all And then it all faded to black And I didn’t know I didn’t know if I’d ever come back And I wondered what I wondered what it was I’d miss And whether I Whether I would be missed They’ll follow you They’ll follow you to their deaths The rest will live The rest will live with whatever’s left The first snow The first snow of the winter Buried the bones The flesh and bones of our loved ones

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released June 5, 2020

Written and performed by Katie Malco

Additional Musicians:
Drums by Andy Jenkin
Bass and Backing Vocals by Stephen Davidson

Production by Andy Jenkin and Jamie Field
Mastered by Sarah Register

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6131 Records Richmond, Virginia

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